Tag Archives: relationships

It’s Just Lunch…Maybe Dessert?

I don’t know if you guys have heard the commercials for this or not, but the whole concept is funny to me.  “It’s Just Lunch” is a dating organization that sets up “busy professionals” for lunch “dates” based off of personality screenings.  If you and said lunch date hit it off, then you can carry on in a normal dating fashion, but if you don’t, hey, it’s just lunch, no harm no foul.  Seems simple enough.  But what does the company get out of this? The satisfaction of setting up 2 people? Yeh, like that pays the bills.  Well when you do a little research (hey, what can I say, I love lunch!), you find out that signing up for this service is a few thousand dollars depending on the region you are in.  You read that right, a couple of THOUSAND dollars.  My first thought on finding this out, was “holy shit, I better be getting dessert with this meal!”  Ask my friends, that’s exactly what I said when I found this shit out.  This “service” has been around for a while, but I actually do not know anybody who has tried it, or will ever admit to trying it.  I think primarily because most of my friends wouldn’t waste a few grand on something like dating.  So my point.  I know we were all waiting for it.  Well, who is willing to spend this kind of money?  Rich people right?  AKA Sugar Daddies and Sugar Mamas.  So maybe this is really a good idea.  Hmm.. Let’s say it’s $4,000 a year, break that down that’s $333 a month.  Per day (assuming weekdays here) that’s about $16-17 dollars a day for a guaranteed lunch date.  If you used it every day.  Since “it’s just lunch” I assume that everything is the pair going dutch.  Using my superior reasoning skills, you could write off in your head (not in taxes) that the $16-17 a day would have gone towards the date anyway, so therefor you are breaking even, but with the ability to be seeing someone new everyday.  Maybe this isn’t such a wonky idea? I have effectively convinced myself in the span of this blog that this shit might actually be legit.  My intention was to hate on this whole company like no other, but from a guy’s perspective, this shit is actually genius.  If you start seeing chicks on the weekends, you decrease the cost of a “date” to about $11.  Damn, not bad at all.  I never realized how persuasive I was, but damn, I’m good.  Oh shit, it’s lunch time! I’m hungry.  I’ll be back later y’all.  No big deal, it’s just lunch…

It’s Just Lunch. Best Idea Ever. According to this Debbie Downer of an image anyway.

PS: All jokes aside, does anybody wanna start an escort service with me that tracks “It’s Just Lunch” dates and sends up a follow up “friend.”  I’m thinking of calling it “How About Dessert?”  I can see myself Scrooge McDucking a tower of gold coins now!

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A Guys Perspective

First and foremost, let me start this off by saying I am by no means an expert on relationships.  But I will follow this up with saying I give great relationship advice.  Maybe I should have been a counselor (Marriage or Guidance perhaps)?  So today, by popular demand (like 2.5 people), I will give the guys perspective on things.  This will be based off the fact that I am a guy, my guy friends are guys, and of course the movies and television.  So the way I’m gonna do this is from 2 different perspectives, the way a guy responds to a girl who likes him and the way a guy shows that he likes a girl.  So ladies, you’re welcome.  With that being said, here we go.

A male’s response to a female:

  • Text message – You text, he doesn’t text back at all.  It means he’s not interested, stop wasting your unlimited texts.  If he responds right away, it genuinely means he’s interested or that he’s not a disrespectful douche (it’s up to you to figure out which one).
  • Phone calls – If you call and he doesn’t call back, walk away from it ladies.  If you call and he has to go take out the trash, or he has to change his flat tire, or he has to paint his kitchen (all happening on consecutive days), guess what, it means he doesn’t wanna talk to you. Move on. On the flip side, if you call and he answers and he talks and laughs at the shit you say, he probably likes you (especially if you know deep in your heart that you are not funny, don’t lie to yourself, you’re probably not funny). If he doesn’t answer the phone right away but calls back, he’s probably into you (unless it’s that friendzone shit, and I have no idea how to fix that).
  • Outings – If he never wants to go out with you, then he doesn’t like you.  If he’s willing to hang out only in group settings, he probably doesn’t like you.  If he is down for one on one time, then he likes you.  If you are always doing the inviting and he is flaky, he probably doesn’t like you.
  • Friends – If you have one of your friends suggest to him that you and him would be “cute together” and he says “nah, I don’t wanna ruin the friendship” that means he isn’t interested (could be genuinely because he doesn’t want to ruin the friendship).  If at any point, the guy asks you about one of your friends, he is NOT interested in you.  Seriously, he just asked about your friend, put 2 and 2 together (if you suck at math, ask a family member for help).
  • Facebook – If you post on his wall, send him a message, poke him, etc and he doesn’t respond, he doesn’t like you.  Seriously, he’s probably stalking out your friends in your pictures.

(Anytime I can link Whitney, RIP, I will do it, this fits though fo’ sho)

A guy who likes you:

  • Text message – He will initiate text messages.  He will most likely include extra letters on simple words like hiiiiiiii or heyyyyy (suuuuppp is not included in this).  He might even send you a :), ;), :P, etc.  If you see any of those, that guy probably likes you (or your guy friend).
  • Phone calls – If he is calling you, he likes you.  If he likes talking to you, then he likes you.  Girls, guys do NOT like talking on the phone.  We just don’t.  We’d rather be doing guy stuff, like sports, watching tv, grilling, or video games.  Phone calls don’t fall under guy stuff.  If he likes you he will call  (it’s up to you to answer).
  • Outings – If a guy likes you, he will want to chill.  He will initiate group events if he knows you don’t chill alone.  He will do alone time if you are down.  Hell, he’ll study with you (aka disrupt the hell out of you while you try to study) if it means he gets to hang out with you.  If a dude likes you, he will always be up for chilling.
  • Friends – If one of his girl friends asks you if you’re interested in him, it means he likes you.  Don’t do the “oh I dunno if he likes me” bullshit.  If a friend asks, it’s most likely that he told them he likes you, or they can see that you aren’t smart enough to pick up on the hints he’s been dropping.
  • Facebook – If he posts on your wall, messages you, pokes you, he likes you.  Really.  He just poked you, what the hell else do you think it means?

(Best pick up line ever, if he uses this on you, then he likes you, “hey baby I noticed you notice me…”)

Obviously there are so many other things, but if females just understood these basics, it’d probably solve 90% of the confusion you associate with us.  Look, men are simple.  We think logically, not emotionally.  To us, if we like a girl, we give off clues to us liking her, we don’t do the whole game thing.  So girls, if you have to think too much about it, he probably doesn’t like you.  If after reading all this you still don’t know, then “man up” and tell him you like him.  Shit, women can vote now, women get educated just like men, and women demand equality in the workplace.  Why can’t you just tell a dude you like him if you are so confused?  I have no idea, I’ll let females contribute a blog (seriously, type it up and send to me, if it’s good I’ll post it) to explain that one to me.  So again ladies to reiterate, I am not saying this is the end all of advice, but you’d be wise to go with it, because according to me, my bros, and TV, this is how it works.

Great movie, any time I can link  Ryan Reynolds it will happen (man crush, no homo). Seriously though, if he likes you, he will let you know, watch the movie!

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