Tag Archives: party


Let me start this by saying this is the greatest restaurant on the planet.  Formerly Showbiz Pizza (Where a kid can be a kid!), Chuck-E-Cheese’s has it all!  It’s got the BEST “worst” pizza ever. People may say not enough sauce and too much cheese, but I say delicious.  The games there are cheap as hell.  Compared to Dave and Buster’s, you could probably save $100 dollars per person per visit (that might or might not be an exaggeration).  Ever since childhood (that lasted til I was like 26) it has been one of my favorite spots to play games.  It’s like a theme park, but closer, cheaper, and with amazing pizza.  In fact, I had my 21st and 28th birthday parties there.  True story.  That actually happened.  So where am I going with all this?  Well I was talking to a stupid friend of mine this morning (emphasize the word stupid, because he really is an idiot) and I was suggesting that we go to Chuck-E-Cheese’s if we win a basketball game tonight.  So it made me think of the amazingness that is their pizza.  Oh and also of what transpired at my 28th birthday party (Enter flashback music and thought cloud).  It was a good 40 to 50 people (more likely 5 or 6 people) who turned out.  Full on adults just straight creeping at a Chuck-E-Cheese’s.  We ate our delicious pizza then went on to just push kids aside as we took over the game floor.  We were Kings and Queens in a land of Munchkins.  We did what we want.  We played Skee-ball like champions, raced each other like we were real professional drivers, and some of us (mainly me) dominated the Pop-a-shot.  In playing a Pop-a-shot though, there was a problem.  Mainly this 9-12 year old kid (no idea what his real age was).  He was at Chuck-E-Cheese’s that night because he had received a “B -minus” on his report card and his mom was rewarding him.  So this little prick, with the encouragement of a few of my jerkface friends, began talking shit to me.  He challenged me, I accepted.  We started playing.  It was obvious from the begining that I was the superior athlete (and probably Mathlete too).  I was killing him (despite some of my friends blocking my shots) and talking trash, but he wasn’t backing down, he kept yapping.  Then boom, game over, I murdered him.  He turns to me and goes, “you still suck.”  Me being the adult that I am responded quickly with, “Hey maybe if you’d have gotten an A on your report card you would have won.”  Ooooohhhh SNAP.  Not only did I win in the game, I beat him in trash talk too.  That lil punk went running off to his mom a loser.  My friends said I was being mean and that he was just a kid.  And you know what, I was being mean, and he was a kid, but don’t dish it out if you can’t take it.  Let that be the first real life lesson he learns.  Maybe it’ll help him in the classroom.  It most likely won’t though.  In the end, it was my Birthday and I could do whatever the hell I wanted to!  Sooo, does anybody wanna go to Chuck-E-Cheese’s with me?

Actual picture from said event. This was only 2 of the 3 tables. We strait ran that place!


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Wedding Season…

So I’m going to another friend’s wedding this weekend (actually 2 of my friends are marrying each other).  It’s summer time so I’m sure everybody has been to one or two weddings already.  Weddings are fun to go to but can also be annoying to attend.  Today, I will break down what’s fun, and what’s annoying.  To my boy getting married this weekend, make sure I have fun or I will make sure to blog about it (kidding….or am I?).  Obviously this is all coming from my perspective (which is ALWAYS the RIGHT perspective), so if you disagree, oh well, I guess it sucks to be you.


  • Dancing
  • Seeing people happy (unless you’re a habitual hater, then this part sucks for you…yes I’m a hater but I appreciate happiness)
  • Good music
  • The “memories” factor – you know when something really funny happens and you will talk about it for years
  • Making fun of bad dancers
  • Making fun of people in general
  • Good food
  • Potential for a choreographed dance (seriously people, this can take your wedding from a 7  rating to like a 10)
  • The Cupid Shuffle/Electric Slide (every wedding should have one of these songs)
  • That one crazy old man (father/uncle/grandfather/random family friend) who ends up dancing with a cane/stick/umbrella


  • Bad music
  • Lack of people having fun
  • Bad food
  • Bad dancers who take up WAYYYY too much of the dance floor
  • Random uncles/parents/neighbors/family friends constantly asking when are you going to get married.
  • Haters – the ones who didn’t want to be at the wedding but solely came to just put on a damn angry face and hate on the bride and groom
  • Children – look people, I love kids, I operate on their brain level, but nothing is more annoying than a crying kid or multiple children running all over the dance floor (exceptions are immediate family members, but they are still annoying)
  • That one person who thinks they are on “America’s Got Talent” and dances as if they are going to win an award.  First off, everybody is making fun of you, second off, you aren’t that good (exceptions are bride and groom, they can do whatever the hell they want, it’s their night).
  • Wedding crashers – the movie was great, but in reality not so much.  Don’t be a douche, you weren’t invited for a reason.
  • Speeches.  Yep wedding speeches are annoying, they just interrupt the party (unless the speech is hilarious, then I will allow it).  Most of the time it’s someone blabbing off inside jokes that no one will get and it’s just painful.

So to my friends getting married this weekend, CONGRATS Aziz and Dana!! And to my friends getting married later in the year or next year or the years to come, just re-read this for my fun vs. annoying commentary so that you can make your wedding amazing.

Holy shit! They had bubbles at their wedding!! That looks like so much fun. Add bubbles to the ‘fun’ list! HAVE BUBBLES PEOPLE!!!

(Now this is funny for many reasons, one being white people are funny to laugh at when they dance, and two being that it says they practiced this the night before…you shouldn’t have to “practice” the Cupid Shuffle the night before…come on white people, this is why people make fun of your dancing!)

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