So I’m going to another friend’s wedding this weekend (actually 2 of my friends are marrying each other). It’s summer time so I’m sure everybody has been to one or two weddings already. Weddings are fun to go to but can also be annoying to attend. Today, I will break down what’s fun, and what’s annoying. To my boy getting married this weekend, make sure I have fun or I will make sure to blog about it (kidding….or am I?). Obviously this is all coming from my perspective (which is ALWAYS the RIGHT perspective), so if you disagree, oh well, I guess it sucks to be you.
- Seeing people happy (unless you’re a habitual hater, then this part sucks for you…yes I’m a hater but I appreciate happiness)
- Good music
- The “memories” factor – you know when something really funny happens and you will talk about it for years
- Making fun of bad dancers
- Making fun of people in general
- Good food
- Potential for a choreographed dance (seriously people, this can take your wedding from a 7 rating to like a 10)
- The Cupid Shuffle/Electric Slide (every wedding should have one of these songs)
- That one crazy old man (father/uncle/grandfather/random family friend) who ends up dancing with a cane/stick/umbrella
- Bad music
- Lack of people having fun
- Bad food
- Bad dancers who take up WAYYYY too much of the dance floor
- Random uncles/parents/neighbors/family friends constantly asking when are you going to get married.
- Haters – the ones who didn’t want to be at the wedding but solely came to just put on a damn angry face and hate on the bride and groom
- Children – look people, I love kids, I operate on their brain level, but nothing is more annoying than a crying kid or multiple children running all over the dance floor (exceptions are immediate family members, but they are still annoying)
- That one person who thinks they are on “America’s Got Talent” and dances as if they are going to win an award. First off, everybody is making fun of you, second off, you aren’t that good (exceptions are bride and groom, they can do whatever the hell they want, it’s their night).
- Wedding crashers – the movie was great, but in reality not so much. Don’t be a douche, you weren’t invited for a reason.
- Speeches. Yep wedding speeches are annoying, they just interrupt the party (unless the speech is hilarious, then I will allow it). Most of the time it’s someone blabbing off inside jokes that no one will get and it’s just painful.
So to my friends getting married this weekend, CONGRATS Aziz and Dana!! And to my friends getting married later in the year or next year or the years to come, just re-read this for my fun vs. annoying commentary so that you can make your wedding amazing.
(Now this is funny for many reasons, one being white people are funny to laugh at when they dance, and two being that it says they practiced this the night before…you shouldn’t have to “practice” the Cupid Shuffle the night before…come on white people, this is why people make fun of your dancing!)