Category Archives: Sports

What We Learned This Weekend…

The first weekend of the NCAA has come and gone…68 teams are now down to the Sweet 16.  My team (NC State) has disappointed me again.  My bracket is busted.  I did better in my picks the 2nd day, but when you lose your “Champion,” you really have nothing else to play for.  So what do I do now that my team is out, my bracket is busted, and my joy and happiness are gone?  Well naturally I root against UNC.  And that is almost, and it’s really close, but almost as good as pulling for an NC State win.  So UNC lost, and I was happy.  OK I was practically doing backflips. But does that mean that’s the end of the tourney for me? Nah, now I can pull against Duke and every other high seed.  Underdogs son.  For the upcoming UNC fans that keep saying “well at least we got further than State did,” I thought you guys weren’t our rival, why the hell are you still talking about us?  And with that, here is what I/we learned this weekend:

  1. Florida Gulf Coast is the 2nd best team in the state of Florida right now to the Miami Heat.  They have WHITE boys dunking the ball with ridiculous athleticism.  Their point guard (also white) is tossing over the shoulder lobs in crunch time.  Their best rebounder is a 6 foot 4 GUARD.  They are how we wish all the teams played in the big dance.  I hope they keep their run goin.
  2. The officials are ruining the tournament.  Seriously NCAA, let’s do something about this.  The amount of missed calls, make up calls, and ticky tack calls are ruining the flow of the games.  It’s all about being fun for the student-athletes and for the fans.
  3. UNC lost, and everybody loves that shit.  You still didn’t beat a single good team this year (here comes the we beat State crowd, so does that mean you’re calling State good?).
  4. Gonzaga should not have been a number 1 seed.  No way in hell.
  5. The Big 10 and Big East have good teams, but damn if 90% of the teams play the ugliest style of basketball ever.
  6. Georgetown out early again.
  7. UCLA fired their coach.  In 10 years, he took them to 3 Final Fours, and he WON the conference in the regular season and got to the championship game in the tournament.  His second best player got hurt the day before the championship game.  Now he’s fired.  Talk about ridiculous expectations.
  8. All those mid-majors and nobody schools did not deserve that many bids.
  9. The idiots who seeded this tournament ruined what could have been a great tourney based on parity.  Who is in that Ohio State bracket?  Look at Louisville (Duke, Mich St.) and Kansas (Michigan, Florida) and Indiana (Syracuse, Miami).. Yeh real fair.  The selection committee wanted to give Gonzaga the best chance to get to the Final Four, too bad they sucked.
  10. Where were the damn Overtime games???
  11. Ole Miss, why the hell were you playing a zone defense with a tie game and knowing that the teams were gonna run weaves and go to the hoop???
  12. The chicken dance by the Florida Gulf Coast team and the “milking the cow” by San Diego State fall short only to Jim Laranaga’s (yes I know I’m missing a tilda, but I still can’t remember how to do that) dance after the Miami game.

Yep, that block was nasty…but seriously, this kid looks funny

Look at the guy in the background on the rim. He’s WHITE… HOLY CRAP HE’S WHITE!!

 

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Tourney Day 1 Recap: Bracket Busted

Quick Recap of Day 1 – I got 9 out of 16 games right, that’s 56.25% for you math majors.  Or as those in my office and friend pools can see, close enough to last place that apparently the girls picking teams based on the sexiness of mascot have a better win percentage than me.  On the bright side of things I’ve ONLY lost 2 sweet 16 teams, and no team that goes deeper than that (yet anyway).  My awesomeness shows more at the end than at the beginning folks!

So let’s get down to teams that disappointed the ever living shit out of me out of my 7 wrong picks.

7. Davidson – I had this upset, and with a minute to go, I HAD THIS UPSET!  Then you blew it, throwing the ball away with under 10 seconds to go and letting them get a layup to go up 1!  Come one son!  I’m sad for you, but I’m a lil more mad at ya.

6. Saint Mary’s – Down 5, 10 seconds to go.  I was like dang it I shouldn’t have picked y’all.  Miracle banked 3 pointer and an in-bounds pass off of dudes face and uh oh we got ourselves a game! But alas the Dellavedova 3 at the buzzer was too long and your attempt at a Disney princess run ended.

5. Missouri – You guys suck. Your coach is cheater.  2 years in a row you should be better than you are but you aren’t.  I hate you.

4. Pittsburgh – I knew I shouldn’t have picked you.  I swear I knew it, but you’re from the Big East (this year anyway), so I thought you’d be better. Nope, you suck.  Jerks.

3. UNLV – California tried everything to give you that game.  Flagrant foul, missed free throws.  But you bested them, 11 minute scoring drought, missed layups, missed jumpers, a billion missed shots in a row.  Oh and not to mention you let that goofy ass white dude dunk the ball on 4 straight possesions.

2. New Mexico – All that hype, high seed, bounced by a bunch of nerds from Harvard.  Really?!? I had you jerks in the Sweet 16.  Thank God that’s all I had you going to.

1. Oklahoma State – Granted Oregon should not have been a 12 seed but shit man, you guys didn’t really show up.  Smartacus, where the hell were you, PG without passing and taking bad shots.  This team couldn’t hit a shot.  Or guard the Oregon guards for that matter, that little dude was running circles around you, literally.  Sweet 16 pick wasted.

Am I bitter? A little bit. Honestly though, none of these games matter to me as long as NC State wins.  Am I a homer when it comes to my team? Yes, absolutely yes!  Let’s Go Pack! Beat the stupid Owls.  And let’s hope I get some more picks right today.  Day 2 show me some love….

Sorry officer, I thought I was going the speed limit….

 

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Let the Madness Begin!

“The ball is tipped, and there you are, you’re running for your life, you’re a shooting star…”

Today is the best day of the year.  Better than your birthday, better than Christmas, and yes better than Flag Day. Today marks the REAL start of March Madness (sorry play in games).  The beginning of the NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament.  64 teams enter, 1 team leaves alive.  The Big Dance.  The party of all parties.  The prom invitation you wanted and if you didn’t get it you’re on the outside looking in.  And when you fall, you go stand at the wall and keep watching the beauty that is college basketball.  Today millions of people will fall ill with a mysterious disease that will cause them to miss the next 2 days of work.  They will be SO sick in fact that they can’t even go to their doctor.  Instead they will sit at home and watch TV to get them through their tough times.  Bracket in hand, every game lifting their spirits or pushing them into a more “ill” state.  And for those of us with the beginings of the sniffles who can not leave work, well TNT, TBS, TruTV, and CBS have us covered, and yep that includes internet streaming.  Productivity will fall today folks, it might as well be a national holiday to be sick these next 2 days.  Cinderellas will be born, Goliaths will dominate, and teams that you have doubted all year will either continue or all of a sudden turn into a cohesive unit and become a juggernaut (please NC State do the latter of this).

Last year I gave you guys the laws of the tourney.  A few rules that happen in this first weekend.  I’ll repeat it for you this year with a few more twists to it.  Enjoy:

  1. There will be a buzzer beater in the first weekend.
  2. There will be an overtime game.
  3. A lower seed will knock off a higher seed.  Some big name school will be out to a college located inside a college (think about it).  Pray to God it’s not your team.
  4. Officiating will affect the outcome of one game majorly, usually in the favor of a higher seed (Most likely UNC, Indiana, Duke)
  5. Announcers (sadly not Gus Johnson this year :(, damn you Fox for taking him) yelling out the phrase “can you believe it?” (Obviously we can, it just happened in front of our faces)
  6. Many of your brackets will be shattered, as your National Champ exits as quickly as the tourney starts (Gonzaga and Indiana, not happenin’).
  7. Some small player will constantly be showered with the praise of “he’s got a lot of heart.” (Is that an insult on his skill?)
  8. A big time school will be shown to be overrated (ahem, Duke, Indiana, UNC).
  9. I will continuously sing “One Shining Moment” in my head (and sometimes out loud) during every game, even though it’s the song reserved for the Champion at the END of the tournament.
  10. ‘NC State Shit’ (coined after my awesome University, look it up on Urban Dictionary) will happen to a majority of the teams.  Could be in the form of a 6 minute 38 seconds scoring drought, or your best player fouling out in the first half, or your best shooter missing all his shots, or blowing a 20 point lead in the second half….really the list goes on.  If your team experiences this, there really isn’t anything you can do except go sit in your room alone and in the dark crying (been there, done that, it’s not fun).  Avoid all sharp objects if any of this happens, just sayin’.
  11. One “Major” conference will be shown to be fraudulent.
  12. The ACC referees specifically will screw one team because they are the worst officials on the planet. (ahem Karl Hess, Teddy Valentine)
  13. New dances will be born and I will love each and every one of them (and I will try to do them at home/work when no one is watching).
  14. I will have a perfect bracket and win a bajillion dollars (that’s the number when a billion and a zillion get together and make babies).

“I’m so excited! I’m so excited. I’m so scared…” If you didn’t get that, then I am sorry you had a horrible childhood.  This is the year for me.  The year for my team. I can feel it through my body (or maybe that’s diarrhea).  Either way, thank you God for this time of year.  Let the Madness begin.  Go State, Go Wolfpack, Go to Hell Carolina!

My Perfect Bracket....I Done Said It!

My Perfect Bracket….I Done Said It!

(Damn where’s Kentucky now? Bob Morris anyone?)

 

 

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Not Our Rival…

Once again Wolfpack nation, the time is upon us where all we will be hearing from the Tar-holes up the road is that NC State is “Not Our Rival.”  Fantastic! Now that we got out the way, we can talk about the upcoming game against those pompous arrogant sons of ……. So yeh game on tomorrow.  Both teams are sitting in that 4th and 5th spot (UVA has tie breaker if records are even) in the ACC, so this game has big implications (and I don’t mean it in a rivalry sense, because, we are not your rivals).  In the past few weeks it seems like Roy Williams has realized his best player is PJ Hairston (only something every other person in America knew from the beginning of the season), and since inserting him the starting lineup UNC has played decent basketball (only decent because they still suck).  And in the last week Coach Gott has inserted TJ Warren in the starting lineup and was rewarded with a 31 point, 13 rebound performance (I told you son, rebound the ball and hit your free throws and look at what it does to your stat line).  So what we’ve learned is that both coaches have started learning how to actually set proper lineups. Everyone knows that the game tomorrow is important psychologically for both teams as well as in the ACC standings (and NCAA resume), so once again I’ll break down the keys to NC State success so that we may avoid the proverbial “NC State Shit” (you know like a missed free throw that’s tipped in at the end of the game to force overtime).

Coach Gott – Play your 7 and only your 7.  The 7 I refer to does not include the Australian guy that can’t get a rebound.  Apparently that is uncoachable.  Preach defense and rebounding, and ball movement, this one pass one shot crap is gonna kill us.

CJ Leslie – Calvin, get your shit together son.  You can’t be mentally checked in 50% of the time.  You turn the ball over too much on plays that you force.  Let the game come to you.  And for the love of God STOP JUMPING AT EVERY PUMP FAKE!! You end up picking up stupid fouls and NOT blocking the shot.  Also, the 1 to 2 goaltends you get a night need to stop, if it goes in it goes in.  I know you wanna be on SportsCenter but I’d rather us win games son.

Lorenzo Brown – I’m glad your back.  Turn the ball over less.  I’m loving the distributing and the attacking the rim, but turn the ball over less.  Keep the defensive intensity up.  Make people remember why you are one of the top Point Guards in the country.

Richard Howell – Stay aggressive.  Avoid the half court fouls.  And once again rebound with TWO HANDS.  Secure the ball please.  Keep working on the jump shot because when it’s on you are un guardable sir.

Scott Wood – Be ready to release the ball WHEREVER you catch it, I don’t care if it’s half court.  Defensively keep the guy in front of you. You’ve gotten lucky a few times blocking shots from behind, but with better players that’s gonna be a dunk and you ain’t blocking that.  Keep moving on offense, just keep moving, make your defenders keep running into screens, they’ll continue tiring out.  But shoot the ball more (and make it more too please).

TJ Warren – Be aggressive man.  Stay rebounding, keep moving without the ball, defend with arms extended, hit free throws.  You did great against FSU, we need that intensity against everybody.  And don’t think I didn’t notice that change in the quickness of release on your 3 pointer, I see you tryna look like KD!

Rodney Purvis – Look man, you are athletic, we know that.  But you miss too many layups and you miss way too many free throws.  What does that equal? Points left off the scoreboard.  Like many other State fans, we hate seeing a 3 on 1 fast break with you dribbling because we know you will NEVER pass it.  How bout passing the ball some to the open people on breaks and calm down a bit to finish your shot.  It doesn’t help if you get fouled if you don’t make the free throws.  Stay in the gym and work on it.  Seriously, go to the gym now and shoot free throws.  You have the chance to be our best on the ball defender, focus on that, your minutes will come. Keep hustling man, the points are waiting for you.

Tyler Lewis – Son I apologize to you, I didn’t think you were ready to play at this level this year, but you have proven me wrong.  Why? Because you’ve realized what you can and can’t do.  So keep that up.  Pass the ball, and move.  Dribble like it’s your job.  The White Shadow strikes again.

I think we beat the d-bags from Chapel Hill, but it’s not gonna be as easy (30 minutes of easy) as it was in Raleigh.  Defend as a team, rebound, and take good shots.  If it’s a shot you can get at any time in the shot clock then it’s not a good shot.  Take the better one.

Go to Hell Carolina! Go State!

For old times sake…Never forget!

ALL RED EVERYTHING!

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The Monday After…

So apparently I’ve turned my blog into an NC State Men’s Basketball blog for the time being.  Deal with it.  So we beat the pretentious assholes from up the road on Saturday 91-83 in a game that honestly wasn’t that close.  Yeh UNC hit some shots to draw to 5 but I can honestly say that at no point did I feel like we were gonna lose that game, and rightfully so, the superior team won.  Some quick points from the game:

  • When NC State plays defense, they are one of the top 5 teams in the country, hands down.  The problem is the whole playing defense thing,  as evidenced by the 57 point second half by UNC that cut a 28 point lead to 8.  When the Wolfpack play defense, they are tough to beat, but they need to learn to play it for 40 minutes and not just 27-32.
  • UNC Coach Roy Williams is still a horrible coach.  He may be a great recruiter but he is a stubborn idiot.  There were many times State was taking it to the Heels and he refused to call a timeout.  It cost ya bro.
  • Roy also is a horrible evaluator of talent on his own team.  There is no reason Hairston shouldn’t have played more.  He was on fire, 19 points in only 17 minutes of play, and he consistently got open looks (part of that is our horrible defense).  I want to know what his excuse for not playing him is.
  • Carolina sucks.  Seriously, they are not a good team.  Their leader James Michael MacAdoo or however you spell it is limited.  He can’t shoot a jumper, he has no low post game, he pretty much can dunk the ball.  Son you should have gone Pro last year when people would have thought you were all potential, now it’s easy to see that you’ve got a lot of work to do.

Now to the post game situations, AKA Twitter and Facebook.  In case any of us were wondering about UNC’s history (and I’m not talking about African American Studies/History classes), every Carolina fan was quick to bust out stats of games from 1776 when America was still in it’s infancy as a nation.  As a fan base, I know State fans can be annoying, but damn if UNC fans don’t take the cake. We aren’t your rivals, we get it, yet you guys are the ones that keep talking about it not us.  Just shut up and hope that your coach learns to coach his team.  I feel a Coach K mystery (yep I still feel K knew his team was gonna suck so he decided to sit one out) back injury coming soon for Roy where he has to sit out a year for his horrible team, only to have it backfire because the guy taking over knows how to actually coach.  Am I a hater? Yes.  Is the truth sometimes confused with hate? Yes.  Am I spitting out truth right now? Yes.

So now let’s talk about a team that actually matters, NC State.  Guys, I’d like to think that you guys read my previous post on NC State Shit and got your shit together, but apparently we need to work on retention.  Our lack of depth might hurt us against certain teams (coughMiamicough), but for the most part the 6 we play are better than the 6 any other team can trot out there.  We just need to get in better shape to play that kind of defense for 40 minutes, it all starts at the gym, with the Coach (also Coach Gott, you could use a timeout every once in a while to give the guys a break).  What I saw was an engaged bunch of kids that blew out a team that talks a lot of trash to the media (Hey Dexter Strickland, nice layup bro!) because their defense was elite for once (for 60% of the game at least).

Leaving points:

  • Don’t blow it against UVA, they have a good defense, but our offense is better.  Defend the perimeter, call out ball screens, keep your hands up (“hand down, man down”), hustle and REBOUND.
  • Don’t get caught looking ahead to Miami, they are gonna be a tough team, but we haven’t proven that we are even ALLOWED to look ahead to other games, one game at a time.
  • Freshmen, please, please, please, work on your free throws.  I’m looking at you TJ and Rodney.
  • When we are getting pressed, please everyone pay attention, the concept that the ball might be coming to you should not be a surprise.  It’s not that hard, they are playing defense, the ball might come to you, actually attempt to know that.
  • Again, the word I use to describe what we should do most is just CARE.  CARE to do the little things, 30 minutes a game isn’t going to cut it, 35 might, let’s try that then we can be lazy again….

Go to Hell Carolina, Roll Pack, WOLFPACK, and whatever else you wanna say, “when we hungry, we eat!”

This poor, poor kid… YAMMMED on….Ouch

 

 

 

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Go To Hell Carolina…

Dear UNC Fans,

We get it, we are not your rival.  We are not your rival in the same regard that your University had an outstanding African American Studies major.  We are not your rival just as much as Mantei Te’o had an amazing girlfriend.  For those of you who got your “UNC Degree” from Wal-Mart, what I’m trying to say is, just because you say it doesn’t mean it’s true (if you still don’t understand, stop reading now, big words like “the” and “to” are probably going to be used frequently and I don’t want you to strain yourselves).  We are not your rival because you say we are not your rival.  Over and over and over again.  So seriously, if we are not your rival, why do you keep talking about us? Because we are not your rival right? Riiiight.  We might not be Duke, but you hate watching us succeed in any sport, you make fun of our “Moo U” college, and you belittle any accomplishment that our university has ever had.  So if we are not your rival, why do you care? Ohhh, it’s because I just kinda defined what a rival is you morons.  But it’s ok, we don’t need to be your rival, we aren’t the ones making a big deal about it.  So this Saturday, when you are losing to your “not rival,” remember that the loss won’t hurt, the loss won’t sting, because it’s just another school that beat you.

Dear NC State Students and Alumni,

I apologize.  I’m sorry that at some point, some of you weren’t taught things by those who came before you.  My generation learned things and didn’t share.  We were stingy.  Or we figured someone else would teach you.  But today I make up for this.  I’m droppin’ knowledge.  First and foremost, you need to learn the fight song, not just the “Go to Hell Carolina!” part.  Learn all the words, it’s not that hard.  Secondly (definitely after learning our fight song), you need to learn the words to the UNC fight song.  Because they are not our rival, they don’t care if we know the words.  I’m amazed by how many people did not learn this “hate anthem” while they were at school, and again I apologize for this.  So while I won’t type our fight song (one of your friends should easily teach this to you) I will give you the NC State version of the UNC “song” (I don’t know if it’s a fight song or just the crappy sound that comes out of their band).  This is not child friendly (unless you have awesome children):

(Again, words to the music their band plays)

In the ditches west of Raleigh,

There’s a place like Hell,

Where Twenty Thousand Sons of Bitches,

Call it Chapel Hill.

Where the bastards born, and the bastards bred,

And when they die, they’ll be bastards dead.

So piss on Carolina-lina, piss on Carolina-lina

Piss on Carolina-lina, ROLL on State!

A few things.  Whoever came up with this is a genius.  And now we have a ROLL reference that can coincide with the “Roll Pack” phenomenon.  Students, learn this song for the game.  Sing it with pride.  You’re welcome.  Keep some tradition going, and when we smash those assholes from up the road, make sure you start a “Not our rival” chant.  I’m sure this will throw their fans in a conniption.  Also students and fans, DO NOT rush the court, it’s UNC for crying out loud, they don’t deserve that kind of treatment.

Yours Truly,

NC State Class of 2003, Civil Engineering

(Who would have thought an engineer knew how to write? Prediction NCSU 87 UNC 76 Go Pack!)

Go to Hell Carolina, Go to Hell!!

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N.C. State Shit…

First off, I know I haven’t done one of these in a while, I’ve been busy getting old and shit.  Second, I know the Super Bowl is coming up, and I’ll hit on that in the next week or so.   So for all you sports lovers, I’ll be giving my end all be all opinion that is actual fact because what I say is actually the only thing that really matters.  But I digress. Today I write about something that I’ve mentioned before.  Something that has plagued my sports fan life.  My love for my University and therefor my undying love for it’s basketball team.  If you aren’t from North Carolina, you probably have no idea what the hell I’m talking about.  So let me learn you something right fast.  Sit back read on, and as my man Kevin Hart said “you goin’ learn today!”

N.C. State Shit – An inevitable chain of events in sports where a blatant bad call or bizarre unlucky play causes a total collapse of confidence, resulting in multiple, unforced, and devastating errors.

That was taken from Urban Dictionary.  It is 100% accurate.  Every school may claim moments like this happen, but if you aren’t an NC State fan, then you have no clue the extent of this damn beast.  I’ve been pulling for NC State from before I could walk (and no this isn’t a wheel chair  “Roll Pack” reference), so I’m an expert on this shit.  Once in our lives we had a non-NC State Shit moment, the 1983 NCAA Championship, since then (some would say since the University unfairly blamed Jimmy V for all that went wrong here is the true start, but because he coached the Georgetown Chris Corchiani foul/travel game, I say it started after the ’83 championship game), our program has been marred by unfortunate events.  Some of the fan base blame the refs, some blame the ACC, some blame the players, the coaches, the Athletic Directors that oversee the program, the fans, the students who don’t support the team, and some blame the media bias towards the assholes in Chapel Hill and Durham (of all the things I said there, the only thing that is 100% true and cannot be denied is that those “people” in Chapel Hill and Durham are indeed assholes).

So that’s all been said.  So why now? Why am I writing this 30 years after the fact?  Well, out of frustration for starters.  And because I am hoping that somebody involved in the program actually reads this and realizes how easy it is to avoid these things.  For the most part of the 30 years I’ve referenced, my team has indeed been one of inferior talent, poor coaching, poor leadership and losing games wasn’t necessarily acceptable but dammit it was understandable.  We’d have our occasional big wins, but the next game, BOOM, NC State Shit.  I got it.  It made sense.  Our team wasn’t better than yours, and when we did beat you it was because 9 times out of 10 you would beat us, but HA, it was time number 10 and it was our turn.  This year, that’s not the case.  With the exception of Miami, Florida State, and Duke in the ACC, we are SUPERIOR, that’s right, SUPERIOR to all the other teams in the conference.  We are probably even SUPERIOR top to bottom to Duke and Florida State as well, and what has me ranking us under Miami is that their team is deeper than ours.  So with that being said, why the hell are we losing to teams like Maryland and Wake Forest and playing close games against Boston College, Georgia Tech, and Clemson?  Well the simple answer is NC State Shit.  The complicated and more accurate one is what I’m about to explain to all of you.  I may not be a sports writer, but dammit if I don’t understand sports, writing, and basketball.  My breakdown of the 2012-2013 NC State Men’s Basketball team:

Coaching:

Mark Gottfried – Let’s start at the top, the man has proven he is a great recruiter.  Coaching wise, it looks like he’s just telling the guys “here is a ball, just go score it, and as far as defense, just run past that line at half court and watch the other team shoot.”  I love that you’ve got the hype around our program up, I love the exposure. But dammit man, this team is far too talented to not know how to play defense.  People may blame the players, but I blame coaching right now.  Teach them to defend.  If they don’t do it, pull them out of the game, at least then we have a reason for losing to teams like Maryland and Wake Forest.  Make them be accountable.  You sound great on camera and on interviews but man, make these kids (yes they are all still kids) learn the fundamentals of the game.  Maybe hold a practice where they aren’t allowed to shoot the ball once and focus only on defense.  We start one of the TALLEST starting 5’s in the country, yet our rebounding and defensive efficiency are horrible.  Bro, that means what you’ve taught them defensively isn’t working, fix that shit now so we don’t come at you with pitchforks and fire at the end of the season.  COACH the team.

Players:

CJ Leslie – Pre-season ACC player of the year.  In-season Invisible man of the year.  You are too talented to disappear in games against shitty teams.  Box your man out.  Don’t jump on every pump fake.  Focus.  Grab the ball with 2 hands.  Put a hand in someones face. Play defense.  Don’t settle for stupid jump shots when you can post a man up.  Use the fact that you are a freak athletically. If you want to make the NBA, you can’t take games off (at least in college, when you get to the NBA do that all you want).  You didn’t leave early last year because you weren’t going to be a 1st round pick.  You know it, I know it, everyone knows it.  Don’t kid yourself.  Play dominant all the time and you will play in the league and get paid, until then keep calm and play with passion ALL the time.  I don’t need the good CJ half the time, we need the GREAT CJ ALL the time.  Oh and stay after practice and shoot free throws, you’re leaving 4 to 5 points a game on the floor.

Lorenzo Brown – One of the best point guards in the country.  Early in the season it looked like he let the NBA cloud  his judgment.  You have the talent, there is no doubt, but use your brain.  You can’t dribble into a double or triple team and try to go behind your back, that’s just stupid.  This isn’t the And 1 mix tape.  Don’t force things, extend your arm on defense, fight through picks, rotate when you get beat to help the man who helped you.  LEAD, not sometimes, but ALL the time.  When the other team goes on a run, grab our guys and tell them “Hey, that team sucks, we are better than them, now, let’s show that.” Also, work on your 3 point shot, your percentage won’t cut it in the NBA.

Richard Howell – If you were 2 inches taller, you would be a lottery pick.  You hustle, you rebound, you scowl at the refs.  You’ve cut down on stupid reach in fouls.  My main gripe with you good sir is that for EVERY rebound you go up with one hand.  Sure it looks pretty, but 2 to 3 times a game, you lose a rebound because you didn’t use both hands.  I know you’re undersized, but the ones that you lose are when people aren’t around you.  Two hands my man, two hands.

Scott Wood – Great shooter….I think that’s all I can say.  If you aren’t hitting, find another way to get in the game, box out, grab the ball then try to pass it, not the other way around. Defend with your body, all of your body, keep a hand in the defenders face. Extend your arms, call out picks, rotate on defense.  Actually run to the player in the corner shooting, don’t just watch them.

Rodney Purvis – 3 on 1 fast break, pass the ball bro. You don’t have to always take it up yourself.  Don’t settle for 3 pointers that you look like you don’t want to take, drive to the hoop, make cuts.  Defensively, keep tight on your player, you get easy points so that you don’t have to pass the ball that way.  REBOUND.  Extend your arms both at the player and up in the air, this makes you BIGGER.  And for the love of God, get in the gym and shoot 1,000 free throws a game, there is no way a top guard should EVER, I repeat EVER, be less than 70% from the free throw line (you’re currently under 60%).  You like scoring, you like points, you’d get 2 to 4 more a game just making the free throws.  Care enough to make them.

TJ Warren – Let me just say that I know for a fact this guy works harder than anybody on the team.  Why? Because he is in the gym ALL THE TIME.  Good for you. Now let’s continue. Great scorer.  He doesn’t have a single play called for him but scores tons of points, because he’s in the right place at the right time.  That’s on offense.  On defense it’s a whole different story.  Sometimes you defend like your hands are in your pockets.  Again, extend your arms on defense, fight through picks, REBOUND.  Your basketball IQ alone should have you averaging 14 ppg and 7 rebounds without a single play being called for you. But you can score all you want, if your man is getting points or you’re late on rotations, it negates all that you did on offense.  Defend better, get more minutes, score more points.

Tyler Lewis – Burger boy All American.  You probably knew you wouldn’t get tons of playing time this year, but when you do, you need to make the minutes count.  You’d prob get more of ’em if you did.  Defend, yeh, you’re smaller than all of them, but (broken record for this team) extend your arms, fight through picks, use your base to hold off a posting defender, run out to the ball on rotations and open shooters.  On offense you’re supposed to be this wonder kid with the ball, but sometimes you make passes that make me wonder what the hell is going on.  If you have to think about passing the ball to someone, it’s already too late, move along to the next option.  To be a great point guard, you have to know when and when not to make a pass (this holds true for Zo as well).  Work on your jump shot, it’s too flat outside of 10 feet.

Jordan Vandenberg – You’re like 8 feet tall, yet you can’t get rebounds.  This doesn’t make a damn bit of sense to me.  Get your damn hands up son!  Don’t even bring them down, EVER, just keep them up.  If you just kept your hands up and stood in front of anybody, they would have to take a difficult shot.  Just keep your hands up.

I’m not gonna list anybody else on the team, because nobody else really gets minutes.  Go back and read the critiques of the players here, it’s all about defense.  Until we learn how to defend on a 3rd grade play ground level (I’m not even asking us to be as elite as we should be), we will continue to lose games to inferior opponents.  It’s as simple as caring.  Do the players care enough to want to win? Do they care enough to want to play in the NBA? If they did, they’d realize the better they are collectively, the more recognition they will get, the better chance your strengths and not weaknesses get highlighted.

This team is good enough to not care, win enough games, make the tournament, make the Sweet 16 and get bounced again like last year.  Or they are good enough to care, show they care, win the ACC, maybe make a Final Four, and all be NBA players at some point.  I mean I care, but there isn’t much I can do outside of ranting on the internet.  I’ll always be a NC State fan, but if I’m getting superior teams that under perform, I don’t think I can handle this as a fan.  I’d rather watch a team of scrubs hustle and lose games than a team of studs lose because they don’t care. So do Wolfpack Nation a favor, start caring, even if it’s just 40 minutes a game, that’s all we want.  Care for 40 minutes every game, for the rest of the season, then when the season is done you can not care all you want.  Just care for us.  Shit care for yourselves.

Ultimate NC State Shit, 3 quarter court shot to lose a game…I had tickets to this game and luckily did not go a few years ago, I am 100% positive I would have spontaneously combusted watching this shit…

With all that being said, please beat the shit out of Carolina.

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Fantasy Recap Week 7…

Yep, I’m lazy and posting this on the Thursday before week 8 games start again…that’s just how I roll, live with it and love it.  At this point, you know what you need to make a solid run and are either feverishly picking apart the waiver wire or are trying to make some trades.  It’s a tough time for lots of the people in the league as some bogus shit will probably start happening now.  Crazy trades that would have never happened in week 1 are now being offered and acceppted, with you being left wondering, “hey is this legit, or are they just trying to let that other guy win it.”  It’s a thin line between legit and tanking trades, but do what ya gotta do I guess.  So enough of that, let’s get to who did us right and who did us oh so wrong last week.

Stars of the Week

QB – Drew Brees – 377 yards and 4 TDs.  Are the Saints back? Nope, they are just starting to play bad teams.  They won’t keep winning, but Brees will keep putting up numbers.

RB – Chris Johnson – 195 yards, 2 TDs.  He’s back!! NOPE..he played Buffalo…he still sucks

RB – Adrian Peterson – 153 yards, TD.  All Day. AP. Whatever you wanna call him, my man is nice.

WR – Vincent Jackson – 7 catches, 216 yards, 1 TD.  Oh and one drag down inside the 5.  You not scoring that TD probably cost some owners in fantasy like it cost your real life team a victory.

WR – Randall Cobb – 8 catches, 89 yards, 2 TDs.  Greg who??  So long as Jennings is out this dude is a top WR.

RB/WR – Victor Cruz – 7 catches 131 yards, TD.  Remove that 77 yard TD catch at the end and his day was meh, but my Skins unfortunately can’t remove that play. Ugh I hate the Giants.

TE – Rob Gronkowski – 6 catches, 78 yards, 2 TDs.  They still somehow had a close game against the JETS…keep throwin the ball Tommy boy.

K – Nick Folk – Almost won the game for the Jets, before the Jets realized they were the Jets…

DEF – Houston Texans – Made the Ravens look horrible forevermore (see what I did there?!). 4 sacks, a safety, 2 interceptions and a Touchdown.  Solid.

Assholes of the Week (Assholes because I done said it yo)

QB – Christian Ponder – 58 yards, TD, 2 INTs…man all you need to do is just throw it to Percy or hand it off to AP.  Stop being so stupid.

RB – BenJarvus Green-Ellis – If this was a real “lawfirm” it’d be shut down for lack of production.  69 yards.  That’s it. I actually blame this one on coaches.

RB – Stevan Ridley – Bro, the Jets, how do you have a bad against them?? 65 yards, at least catch a pass or something!!

WR – AJ Green – One catch 8 yards and a TD.  Bengals coaches, if his one catch was a TD, don’t you think you should throw to him more? Thank you..ugh.

WR – Calvin Johnson – 3 catches, 34 yards.  Mega horrible.  Lots of drops too.

RB/WR – Larry Fitzgerald – 4 Catches, 29 yards.  Horrible day for star WR.  But his excuse is his QB sucks.

TE – Vernon Davis –                    (the empty space preceding this represents his presence and stat line of last week).

K – Jason Hanson – 1 extra point.  Thank you though! Because that’s all you got this week, I was able to beat the guy who had you!

DEF – New Orleans – EVERYBODY puts up yards against them.  Over 500 yards and Freeman went bizzerk on em.

Free Agent Pick Up of the Week

Chris Cooley.  Ehh, not big on it, but you could do worse at tight end at this point.

…unless my team sucks, then “I wasn’t really paying attention to fantasy football this year.”

 

 

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Fantasy Recap Week 6…

Why hello there!  If you are 6-0 at this point in the Fantasy Football season, just know that you are lucky assholes or that everybody else in your league sucks…or a combination of both of these.  At this point, your team is either a source of full on joy every Monday/Tuesday morning or just pure unadulterated disappointment.  Look at the standings, and look at the team in 6th place.  See how far back you are on them.  If it’s 1 or 2 games, you still got a shot at this!  If it’s more than that, then figure out a way to get everyone’s passwords and start trading players to your team!  And with that folks, our do-ers and don’t-ers of week 6!

Stars of the Week

QB – Aaron Rodgers – 6 TD’s.  I don’t need to say much else.

RB – Shonn Greene – 3 TD’s.  The first and last time a Jets player will be on this list.  His first and last name are spelled wrong, just saying.

RB – Ahmad Bradshaw – 116 yards and a TD against the 49ers defense.  Kudos to you sir.

WR – Jordy Nelson – 9 catches, 121 yards 3 TD’s.  How pissed off do you think the Texans’ cornerbacks were that a white dude was zooming by them catching TD’s all game?

WR – Wes Welker  – 10 catches, 138 yards, TD.  That’s not including the big ass hit he took in the first half.  And yes, this is probably the first and only time 2 white WR will make the Stars team.  I’m not racist, I’m just saying Ben Affleck’s aren’t typically doing big thangs on the same week  (“You white, you Be Affleck”).

RB/WR – AJ Green – 7 catches, 135 yards, 2 TDs.  For the record he isn’t white.  They still somehow lost this game.

TE – Antonio Gates – 6 catches, 81 yards, 2 TDs.  And he was sitting on my bench, because he hadn’t done shit the past few weeks.

K – Jason Hanson – 4 FGs.  2 XP.  Solid day old man.  21 years in the league.  My kids will be kickers dammit!

DEF – Denver Broncos – This award really should go to Philip Rivers, but hey they did it to him. 4 sacks, 4 INTs, 2 Fumble recoveries and 2 TD’s.

Assholes of the Week (I call it like I see it)

QB – Philip Rivers – 4 INT’s and 2 Fumbles.  Led directly to 2 defensive TD’s.  And you cost me a win this week asshole!

RB – Marshawn Lynch – 41 yards?  More like Least Mode son.

RB – Michael Turner – 33 yards…God you suck.

WR –  Miles Austin – 2 catches, 31 yards.  Got the big money and sucks.  There is a reason he wasn’t drafted high in real life.  That reason is he sucks in real life.

WR – Dwayne Bowe – 3 catches 25 yards.  Not all his fault…his QB is Brady Quinn.

RB/WR – Stevan Ridley – 34 yards.  It was raining, why the hell did the Pats throw the ball so damn much??

TE – Vernon Davis – 3 catches 37 yards.  Guess the Giants figured out how to stop you since that playoff game huh?

K – David Akers – 1 made FG, 2 missed FG.  Asshole!

DEF – Indianapolis Colts – They made the JETS look good.  Do you know how bad you have to be to do that???

Free Agent Pick Up of the Week

Josh Gordon – Cleveland Browns.  Supplemental pick leading to fantasy sleeper.  Get him now folks!

So, so true.

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Fantasy Recap Week 5…

5-0, 4-1, 3-2, 2-3, 1-4, 0-5….you’re one of these.  If it’s the last 2, just make sure you set your lineups for the rest of the year so that you don’t give anybody any easy wins, otherwise you’re good to just casually observe.  For the rest of us, we’ll just look forward to playing your shitty teams every week. Seriously though, there is no reason for you to be 1-4 or 0-5 unless you realllllly suck or you just have bad luck with the scheduling.  If it’s the latter, good luck tryna win the rest of your games to make the playoffs…or just pray you are in a league with a bunch of idiots and you actually legit have a shot.  5-0 and 4-1 don’t get too cocky, you ain’t in the clear just yet.  The magical number for most leagues is 7 for a 12-team league and 8 for a 10-team league, so get to the 7 or 8 win total and that will guarantee you a playoff spot. And now to our friends and enemies of the past week…

Stars of the Week

QB – Drew Brees – He killed it 370 yards and 4 TD’s, broke the record for consecutive games with a TD, and won the game too (only because the refs pretty much guaranteed there was no way in hell the Chargers were winning that game)

WR – Reggie Wayne – Wow, where was this last year?? Oh you didn’t have a QB, ok ok…13 catches, 212 yards and a TD.  Bravo sir, bravo

WR – Marques Colston – He’d have a bajillion TD’s if he didn’t drop the ball so damn much, but 9 catches 131 yards and 3 TDs is a glorious day.

RB – Ahmad Bradshaw – 200 yards and a TD…so much for Andre Brown doing something relevant.

RB – Arian Foster – 152 yards and a TD…typical day at the office.

WR/RB – Percy Harvin – 8 catches 108 yards 1 TD, 8 rushing yards 1 TD…I love you Percy…

TE – Tony Gonzalez – 13 catches 123 yards 1 TD… I hate your guts Tony G…please make note this was against my Redskins…ugh

K – Blair Walsh – Hit 3 FGs and 3 Extra Points… He’s a kicker, he did his job.

DEF – Chicago Bears – 2 TDs again this week…another dominating performance…

Assholes of the Week (Assholes because let’s face it, these douchebags suck)

QB – RG3 – I love you man, but freaking slide, I don’t need to see you leaving games early both for real life football and fantasy!

RB – Fred Jackson – Hey guy, just get hurt already so that CJ Spiller can kill it again! Or you can stay healthy and provide us with 29 rushing yards…

RB – Maurice Jones-Drew – 56 yards…your team sucks, this actually isn’t your fault.

WR – Andre Johnson – 1 catch 15 yards.  THROW HIM THE DAMN BALL SCHAUB!

WR – Mike Wallace – 2 catches 17 yards. What is this shit???

RB/WR – Chris Johnson – You guys thought I forgot about this asshole.  Nope, I’m not even looking up his stats because I just know that he sucked.

TE – Antonio Gates – 3 catches 19 yards.  I blame the refs partly for this, taking away a few of his catches with bullshit penalties.

K – Mason Crosby – In most formats, you amounted to 1 fantasy point.  You suck kid!

DEF – Buffalo Bills – Gave up 300 yards passing and rushing to the 49ers! Alex Smith is their QB, how is that even possible!?

Free Agent Pick Up of the Week

Vick Ballard – Who? yep, go with it folks, your new starting RB for the Andrew Luck(y) Colts.

Admit it, you are this guy on Sundays….

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