Awkward….

If you know me (you think you know, but you have no idea! YOU DON’T KNOW ME!!), then you know that I am all about awkward situations.  I live for them.  I’m witty enough to maneuver through an awkward sitch if I’m put in it, so I’m good.  But you? You good sir/ma’am are not as adequately equipped in the brain department as myself.  And this means, awesomeness (for me, not for you).  I love putting people in awkward situations just to see how they react.  I kind of use it as a social experiment, to find out what people are made of.  I also like to look at it as “Friend Try-Outs.”  I judge you (that’s right, I judge) on how your interactions with complete strangers hold up to my “standards.”  Sometimes I’ll mix 2 groups of friends with each other, and make sure I sit in a corner spot so that people HAVE to interact and mingle.  Then I sit and observe and make fun of the nervousness of some people.  Or maybe I’ll be out and will just randomly start talking to a waitress/waiter and see how embarrassed/annoyed/frustrated the people I’m with get.  It’s all fun, and to me, it’s all in the name of science (no idea what particular science, awkwardology maybe?). So the next time you wanna figure out who you wanna cut out of your real life “buddy list,” I suggest something quick and simple.  Pull together your 2 worst groups of friends (you know the ones that you were debating on cutting out of your life), and put the “Friend Try-Outs” to a test.  See who responds the best, see who fails miserably.  Hell you don’t have to be loyal to a particular side, you can pick the strong from the weak, Darwinism at it’s best.  I guarantee entertainment, and at the end of the night, you will know whether your so called “friends” are worthy enough to stand by your side. You only live once (YOLO!!!) so you might as well alienate as many people as you can in the process (evil laugh moooahahahahaha). May the odds forever be in your favor…..(did that work here? I dunno, let’s go with it though).

I created this moment. Trademark/Patent Pending!!! (shaking my fist in the air!!)

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